Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
In America we eat man semen.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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