Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Will you blow on my dice?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
