so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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