Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
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