Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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