he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I have tasted many bathrooms
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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