After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
