So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
i think i just lost a toe
Randomize
