she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
