Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
