It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
