She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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