he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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