yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Welp...herpes.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
