I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Randomize
