do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
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