Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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