where am i from again
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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