Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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