He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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