and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize