Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Randomize