Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize