He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
21 Disappointing Confessions From Teenage Fathers
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this