3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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