Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
