...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
