(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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