What did we do last night that was yellow?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
