Ambien. No doubt about it.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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