i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
