I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
and you fell through a lawn chair
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize