I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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