What tipped you off? The sombrero?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
