Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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