My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
