I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
