i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
