walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
being pregnant is like rehab
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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