i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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