i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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