My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize