whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
