Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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