yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
