I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I love you. Go after that dick
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..