you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Someone signed my nipple.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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