Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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