do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize