just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
