Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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